Top Ten "You know you have young children at Christmas when..."

...hey, I remembered my password!






"You know you have young children at Christmas when..."

10. Your tree is barren on the bottom and heavily decorated on top

9. The beautiful glass orbs that decorated your tree last year are quickly being replaced by popsicle stick artwork and crayon-abused, glitter-covered paper discs with a picture of the smiling artist glued to the center

8. The only gifts you dare put under the tree before Christmas morning are wrapped in an impenetrable tungsten carbide wrapping paper you were lucky enough to pick up at Wal-Mart last year before the product was recalled back to China

7. You have added "A sizable helping of sanity" to your Christmas wish list

6. You frequently find yourself "gently" reminding the mischievous elves scurrying about your home that Santa knows when they are sleeping, he knows when they are awake, and he knows when they smear toothpaste all over the sink, walls, floor, and ceiling?! of the bathroom

5. Everyone in your home knows by heart what Santa puts in naughty kids' stockings

4. You have seriously considered contributing a new example of the definition of "infinity" to Wikipedia as, "The number of times your child can ask 'how many more days until Christmas?' before tiring"

3. You have made it a personal quest this year to find a gift for the youngest ones that will be more enticing than the box it is wrapped in

2. You feel a little dumb Googling "is it possible to overdose on sugar" but are then both comforted and a little appalled to see there are about 2,400,000 results

1. Christmas has been canceled and reinstated multiple times... in the last 24 hours

Merry Christmas!

Daylight Savings Time: The rest of the story

Spring forward, fall back. That’s how I was taught to remember it. Oh how deceptive those terms are.

Spring forward –

All light, airy and worry-free, it sounds like we’re making some real progress here; getting ahead in life, taking an extra turn in Monopoly, skipping past opponents in Candyland, or nearing the finish in that never-ending game Chutes and Ladders. However, nothing could be further from the truth. The truth is much darker – depressing in fact. The reality is… you LOSE. That’s it, lose; not win. We’d call you a loser, but that term isn’t PC, so we will call you winning challenged. And just what did you lose oh winning challenged one? You lost an hour. Where did it go? Did you get anything in exchange? No, sir, you lost. Go straight to jail, do not pass GO, and do not collect $200.

Fall back –

Just the opposite here – fall back, as in retreat, as in you are being defeated. Your army is losing. Men are dying. Or even if it’s not as bad as death, you’re still trying to get away. Run away, little boy, the bullies are coming for you. Your hair looks like it could use a swirly and they found a toilet with your name on it. There is nothing pleasant here at all. Or is there? When we fall back, we actually get a GIFT! We are given an extra hour.

“Excuse me, sir, I’d like to purchase that set of 24 hours on the top shelf there. That should be enough to get me through until Monday…”

“Great, and as a one-time special offer, with today’s purchase we are throwing in one extra hour, free of charge!”

“Wow! I feel like I’ve won the lottery! I’ve never won anything before in my life.”

“So, what are you going to do with your extra hour?”

“I’m going to Disneyland!”

Post Turkey Post

Well, I cooked the Thanksgiving turkey too long and the meat was a bit dried out but palatable nonetheless. We had invited the missionaries over for dinner the day after Thanksgiving and were planning on having leftovers and a fresh pie. Not wanting to serve the turkey as it was, Nikki saved the day by making her best batch of turkey tetrazzini ever. Yum. Thanks hon!

Happy Thanksgiving

Nikki just made some amazing stuffing. Now I just have to figure out how to cook a decent turkey and we're most of the way there. My turkeys tend to be hit and miss -- no, I'm not referring to roadkill; I'm talking about juicy vs. too dry. I'll let you know how it goes tomorrow. Happy Thanksgiving all!